Falklands
Falklands, also known as Polsxa and more recently as Goaboa is an oldfag and former Second in Command and Tactician of Stryker's metagroup. He is best known for his vast variety of contributions to the community across many platforms, and accolades within the server itself. In recent history he is best known as the Leader of Portugal in 38.0.
Table of Contents
Early life
While on his daily visit to /pol/ in search of new info-graphics to read and Risk threads to dominate, Falklands/Goa stumbled upon a shill thread for /int/craft made by uhFiliate. Intrigued by the concept of building civilizations in minecraft, he quickly joined the server with great enthusiasm despite being late to the party.
11.0
Nation: South Korea → Egypt → Poland
Ironically, he arrived on the same day as his future friend Stryker suffered his first defeat while playing as ISIS. Completely clueless and geographically illiterate, Falklands wandered around the Eastern Mediterranean, hopelessly searching for Norway because it was white and based, he thought. He ended his first day in the server by building a cobblestone hut in Bulgaria, near the fortress of Mezek.
The next day, he logged in to continued his travels hoping to find a town. With the server being around 2 weeks old by this point, most factions were largely inactive, especially in Europe where Falklands desired to play. He settled for South Korea, led by Terribird, a very seminal choice. He then left Seoul for Cairo, and then left Cairo for Europe, eventually discovering Krakow, Poland (located ingame in Budapest, lol). This was unironically the first time he had ever heard of Poland before. Eager to begin playing the server for real, Falklands fell in love with Krakow, and dedicated himself to making it even better. He doubled the number of buildings, renovated existing ones, and improved the streets and gardens.
In yet another series of highly seminal events, Falklands met his first threat: Notorious memeraider XDA1. Due to Falklands being one of the few active players in Europe in a town without any defenses, he was constantly raided by XDA1 from his base in Switzerland. Falklands was enraged by these attacks, and grew to hate XDA1, and vowed to never visit Bulgaria irl (This, also, was the first time he had ever heard about the existence of Bulgaria.) In response, Falklands drastically fortified his beloved city. Tunnels were dug under each house, and then a great wall was built around the outskirts of Krakow. Around this time, the Russian coalition of 11.0 decided to crush XDA1's 1 man(f) memetown for unknown reasons. Falklands valiantly joined the fight with them while blasting Sabaton, basically just being happy to be there as he had absolutely no idea how war worked.
Once the XDA1 problem ceased, a familiar face had moved in south of the Danube. South Korea was conquered by the DPRK, so Falklands 's former town leader Terribird moved to Europe, creating Belgrade. He angered the remaining local powers by murdering foreign volunteers who were building houses in Palermo. Falklands was one such volunteer, but was spared because Terri considered himself allied to Poland. Soon after, Vespi, ally to the victims, planned an invasion of Serbia, to which Terri was completely unaware. Sometime late into week 3 of the server, an International coalition of Poland, Italy, and the U.N besieged Belgrade, completely destroying it. Terri was left coping in his towny-plot claimed cuckshed. This was the start of the Infamous, neverending Falklands-Terri bloodfeud.
Falklands became friends with Vespi, and was excited to join his planned HRE faction in the upcoming 12.0 Iteration. He joined the skype group, and then completely forgot about /int/craft until the summer of 2016. For many years he has lamented missing 12.0 and 16.0.
17.0
Nation: Texas → Switzerland
This, and the following iterations up until 24.0 (dubbed the “/int/craft Dark age by Falklands himself) are largely forgotten by most players. Some of which were so short and mediocre that their very existence has often been questioned. Had Falklands not poopsocked each of them during his summer vacation and beyond, they would have likely been forgotten completely.
On a bright summer day, on yet another routine trip to /pol/, Falklands rediscovered /int/craft through a shill thread made by Luna for 17.0. He wasted no time and eagerly logged in, joining Texas. After fending off memeraids from the Norse, Falklands got bored playing in Texas and left to make a comfy town in Switzerland, where he spent the rest of the server.
18.0
Nation: Japan
Falklands joined the server with low expectations, as was normal for the time. He joined Japan, under the surging upstart ncordo. Before the server abruptly perished, Falklands spent his time struggling to understand Japanese architecture.
19.0
Nation: Wroclaw
Jealous of the popularity of ncordo, Falklands used this new, barebones, shitty server to shoot his shot at ghouliphate glory. He successfully united the servers entire playerbase –no more than 30-40 players– into the Polish town of Wroclaw. (He was a bit of a poleaboo at this time after 11.0). Together, they made a rudimentary town, had a public execution, built defensive walls (???) and discussed their first blowjobs.
20.0
Nation: Austria-Hungary
Far and away the only high quality iteration of the dark age, 20.0 was highly anticipated in this era of low effort meme servers. Falklands by now had grown a taste for leading his own towns. He decided upon leading Austria-Hungary.
Depressingly, Falklands (accurately) predicted that he probably wouldn't attract many players to his faction, yet nonetheless planned a decent sized city for Vienna, and even made a government building with parliament seats for provinces of the empire. Unsurprisingly, they were never used. He did however attract some players including: about 4 Australians who made their own Slum one night never to return, Someone named TaylorSwift with a TaylorSwift skin, and finally a friend named Rob3rt_E_Lee (Rip) who played in 17.0 Switzerland and built the majority of Vienna. It was on this server where Falklands first met Stryker, and warned him that firespread was on, which endangered his Wooden walls. Soon after they were replaced with Quartz.
Austria, being a 1 man town, was geopolitically irrelevant. Bordering the much larger empires of France (Vespi3) and the German Empire (Stryker123abc), Falklands was eternally anxious of being invaded. Being a student of /int/craft lore by now, he blindly assumed that the British faction was invincible due to most of them being apart of the Norse, and Allied them out of fear of his larger neighbors. When grace was over, Falklands helped defend the British against the combined forces of France and Germany, to no avail. Seeing the writing on the wall, Falklands opted to then become friendly with the Germans by helping them suppress a colonial rebellion in Namibia, and putting an end to the ncordo chimpout.
Near the end of the server Falklands was growing tired of witnessing all of the cool events around him and being irrelevant himself. He seriously considered joining Japan late in the server and leaving behind Austria. Falklands he just changed his skin to a Japanese soldier when he realized Germany had successfully conquered Japan without much of a fight. After some turbulent Administrative decisions, Leskovar ragequit being Admin and left it to TerriBird, effectively killing the server. Terri used his new power to spawnkill Falklands in Vienna. This marks his only real victory in their long standing feud.
Vienna was officially declared the server's best city by Leskovar.
21.0
Nation: Switzerland
Now a regular in the wider /int/craft community, Falklands planned to join the hilariously over-ambitious oldfag hugbox Abbasid Caliphate, but upon realizing it was completely dead on arrival due to terrible planning and even worse leadership, he left to once again make Switzerland. It was here he met Ducke, an oldfag from 10.0. The two got along and became friends, and made Switzerland one of the best (and only) towns on the server.
Ncordo led Norway, and memeraided Switzerland soon after its founding. Defenses were quickly built. Threatened with the burning of Switzerland's wooden walls via firecharge cannon, Falklands called upon every one he knew to ward off the invaders. Once they were vanquished in the Alps, Falklands led his small faction to Norway to return the favor. This was basically the only real event of the entire server. Swiss_Dave Admitted that Falklands 's Switzerland this iteration was superior to all of his past towns there.
22.0
Nation: Venice → Rome
Despite /int/craft still being in the midst of a community-wide dry spell, Falklands 's enthusiasm to play never waned. He decided to make a city under Rome in Aquileia with Ducke. They built a medium-sized city about the size of Venezia. The Politics of the server were flipped on their heads however when XDA1 of Carthage sieged Rome when only Lemon and Ducke were online to defend it. Rome had fallen to Carthage, and as a result Falklands seceded from Rome and became independent for about a week, until Rome was swiftly reconquered the next weekend. By now, Rome had become so massive that it bordered Aquileia itself, and at Tira's request, Falklands disbanded the town of Aquileia so it could be annexed by Rome for ease of building.
Ncordo joined the server very late to once again lead Japan. They memeraided europe constantly. The best Japanese warrior, xpervz, rode to Europe one day in search of a good battle. Falklands happened to be exploring Gaul, looking for much the same. The two met in the fields of the Seine, and a great battle ensued. After 10 minutes of attrition, Falklands' armor had broken, and xpervz had lost his horse. Falklands came to battle bravely riding his best horse, a legendary white one that was invincible. This allowed him to absorb xpervz attacks and compensate for his lack of armor. Eventually, xpervz had used every last weapon he had, and was cut down in the river seine. The two have great respect for each other ever since.
23.0
Nation: N/A
Falklands planned to yet again make a new town, this time Athens. He got to work prebuilding it, despite not really having any understanding of Greek culture or architecture. When the server released, he only got to play for a few hours before the server died.
24.0
Nation: France → Iraq
Falklands originally planned to make Poland for this server, but lost motivation to do so after Ducke decided to play with the Bronies. Instead of making yet another largely irrelevant 3 man meme town, Falklands decided to do something different. France, led by Nektarn, seemed like a nice tight-knit group of bros to join and have fun with. Falklands joined them expecting the typical comfy /int/craft experience, building, memeraiding, politicking etc. He did not expect however, the horrors to come.
When the Italian Pones and many Norse surpise attacked Paris, everyone was shocked. Falklands fought nervously to defend his city all weekend, this time as the target of the /int/crafters he once respected. The next weekend began much the same, but the attackers were just too much. Once Paris lost it's airport, the city was lost. Seeing XDA1 casually search his house, and his friend Ducke with the invading force lit a fire in Falklands. He joined Kuwait (Iraq) to continue the fight, marking his first time playing with Strykergang.
For the rest of the server, Falklands fought as hard as he could. It seemed though that no matter how hard anyone tried, the Ponies were just invincible. The Grand Coalition at large was unable to stop them anywhere save for a few minor victories like Stuttgart. First France, then Japan.. Even Proud Baghdad gave up without a fight, having lost all morale after a lifetime of war. Falklands absolutely despised this feeling of powerlessness. He vowed to himself 3 things after the iteration had ended: #1. He would never, ever lose again. #2 He would one day rebuild Paris even stronger to redeem himself. #3 BRONIES DELENDE EST
After the iteration was over, he officially joined Strykergang with the single minded goal of getting revenge on the Bronies. He dedicated himself to improving every aspect of Strykergang in order to ensure that they would be able to defeat the Bronies in the next server. This included him unironically doing shit like reading the Art of War multiple times, developing the first real meta defenses, theorizing ingame tactics, and even grinding gun pvp on future test servers to ensure he was the absolute best pvper he could be for the group. Hell, he even had a mineman identity shift, renaming himself Falklands (previously Polsxa) and adopting his classic Soldier skin. He was more determined than ever.
Pandacraft
Nation: Morocco
Falklands hoped to avenge his loss to the pones here. He logged on the server, unphased by its extremely rocky start, and got to work. When he woke up the next morning, it was already dead lol
25.0
Nation: Austria-Hungary
After an entire summer of bedwars and Liqtoria 2 with the rest of his new metagroup, Falklands quickly rose up to commander status within Strykergang due to his enthusiasm to crush against their shared arch-rival. After 10 months of preparing, the Time had finally come. It was all on the line, the only shot at get revenge! BRONIES DELENDE EST!
With the server falling on Thanksgiving break, Falklands along with most of Strykergang poopsocked the server, and made some of the best memories in the group's history. Many fun times were had, many hilarious voicecalls. But Falklands never lost track of his personal goal. Once war day was near, he was back at home, on his main PC, and ready for war. Confidence was high among the men, and they bravely pushed together straight through the Pone's double-walled city. Poetically, Falklands was the one to place the final claim on the Pony homeblock, successfully redeeming himself and avenging Paris. A few days later, Reno returned control of Danzig to the Bronies due to the rules of some half-baked RP revolt system Reno added, resulting in Strykergang prompty quitting the iteration entirely after their hard work was stolen from them.
26.0
Nation: Sweden-Norway
A new 1880s iteration was announced, by a new Admin. A newfag then known as epicfaillord, then later Onions. Once word had reached Falklands and Strykergang, planning commenced. The group chose Sweden-Norway, but this time however, Stryker was moving, and couldn't be there. Despite the best efforts of PandaPieForAll, the group desperately lacked the stability and leadership it was used to. Falklands realized this, but wasn't yet that type of figure himself either, and worried greatly that it would result in another Brony Rapenkrieg on his now disoriented group. Worse still, the Ponies seemed eager to bring the fight back to Strykergang, consolidating in St. Petersburg.
The group nonetheless had a good time despite the seemingly desperate situation. Falklands spent much of the server volunteering in foreign memeraids, particularly with ncordo's faction in the Caribbean. In perhaps a twist of fate, Onion's greenness in hosting resulted in a host of server issues, eventually leading to its premature end. Secretly, Falklands and most of the group were relieved. Crisis avoided.
27.0
Nation: Neo-Confederacy
Nurse_reno was back for one last run at /int/craft. It was set in the near future, 2030, which motivated Stryker to play as the Neo-Confederacy in America.
By this point, Falklands had taken an increasingly active role in the design of Strykergangs bases, and originally planned for their Capitol to be on the Appalachians in Georgia to avoid having to terraforming for the entire server. Stryker refused to build a town on a mountain, and so they settled for Tallahassee, FL, resulting in the entire group spending most of the server's lifespan terraforming. Tallahassee ended up being hilariously underdeveloped, and everyone within the group considers it to be their worst. Falklands, once again reduced to his laptop, spent his time doomgrinding away the Appalachians near Tallahassee at 20 fps. He spent several hours attempting to drive a free tank he found in Europe back to the South, exploring the beautiful lands of Siberia and Cascadia, only for the tank to get stuck in a river somewhere in the Midwest.
When war came, Falklands and the rest of the gang ran through the motions: Ice highways, Claim flags, Global Coalitions, and so on. The battle resulted in a 16 hour stalemate due to OP vehicles with infinite ammo, spawning an innate hatred of Vehicle warfare in Falklands ever since.
28.0
Nation: Deseret
The nearly 2 year long bloodfeud between Strykergang and the Pones had quietly ended after the siege of Voii. Both groups seem to have silently agreed that enough was enough. When Fili announced his new iteration, it was like a complete breath of fresh air. Falklands initially wasn't very hyped for the iteration as he didn't care for the groups choice to play as Deseret, and hated the custom America crop map even worse. Eventually however, he came around, and became completely addicted to the server, spending almost the entirety of a family visit on /int/craft.
Salt Lake city rivaled Budapest in terms of overall comfyness for everyone. Whether it was blatantly Killauraing in the city streets, duping guns, building old western shops, playing hopscotch literally for hours, spamming blue lives matter flags everywhere, to simply trolling Stongduke, the group as a whole had a complete blast. Falklands built a fancy Hotel, and a prison fashioned after Enies Lobby, but couldn't finish it in time. Falklands blatantly hacked during 100% of this iteration due to Fili's lax rules, and was banned several times. he once regained his freedom by rap-battling Crippo. Falklands's freestyling was horrible and he's glad that nobody remembers it.
Strykergang had declared war on ncordo Cuba to reinstate the legitimate Kang of Cooba. Falklands had returned home to his main PC for war, having just hit summer vacation, only to lag his ass off during the Siege. Despite a respectable K:D, He was extremely pissed and unsatisfied. After another victory, Falklands was eager to continue building SLC with Stryker, but the server unfortunately was shut down prematurely by Fili.
29.0
Nation: Spanish Empire
Falklands was super motivated to Fili's new server. Inspired by the beauty of ncordo's Cuba, he convinced Strykergang to play as Spain, but centered in Sardinia so he could make his own island town for the first time. The server was completely DoA, and no one in Strykergang bothered playing past launch day. Hearing of the defeat of Ottoman Sultan “TheFartingGamer” to the British, he joined the server to witness the aftermath. Although He can't really say why, Falklands declared he would avenge TheFartingGamer.
30.0
Nation: Yugoslavia
On the Test Server before the server launched, Falklands created the city map seen on many future test servers. Among these builds includes Fort_nigger. This server would be a turning point for Falklands. Before, he would play along with Strykergang, priding himself on his pvp skill and helping with some minor planning. With PandaPieForAll leaving to join the Marines, Falklands now found himself in the “Second in Command” position for Strykergang. He took pride in his new responsibility, and did the majority of the group's overall planning ever since. Being a respected member of the community at this point, Falklands was placed on Onion's committee for the entirety of the Onions Trilogy. He took pride in secretly hacking (not for pvp) for each of these servers knowing how much Onions despised it.
With the server itself being announced months in advance by its admin Onions, Falklands kind of over-planned things since he was a neet at the time. He designed the layout for the town, defenses and chestroom for Belgrade, recruited new members, and even gathered a pre-server coaliton against the British, who were playing Croatia (He seriously did this to avenge TheFartingGamer), right next to Strykergang in Serbia. Falklands would quickly learn that planning so much for a simple minecraft server wasn't so useful once the server released. The diplomacy of Serbia flipped entirely several times, his super-fortress of Belgrade was never seriously attacked and a little overkill, and many new recruits didn't pan out. Falklands' personal semi-grudge against the British would play out during the surprise attack of Croatia, which became an immediate stalemate due to the vehicles meta. Voii made Falklands dislike vehicles, but after this battle he absolutely despised them, lobbying ever since against them in any capacity. He was one of the server's best pvpers, earning the respect of even numried.
Strykergang regardless would go on to be very successful this iteration, eventually allying with the British to conquer the modern version of ncordo's old group, Crippogang. Falklands felt he could have done a much better job, and overall didn't care too much for this server as it was very war focused and most towns were very ugly. Strykergang was declared the canonical victor of the iteration.
31.0
Nation: Syria
The second server in the Onions Trilogy played out much the same as the first for Strykergang. Falklands used the lessons of Yugowars the best he could to make his group even better prepared than last time. Stryker had little enthusiasm to play another server like 30.0 and only actually bothered because of the server's impressive launch day playercount.
Falklands designed his next town Palmyra, Syria to be an refined and much more compact version of Belgrade. This meant smaller walls, a simplified chest room after receiving complaints from Ghoul about his inability to navigate Belgrade's, and heavier investment into Auxiliary field defenses. Strykergang, sick of the constant diplomacy required to survive modern intcraft, memeraided the server with impunity, relying on meta alliances to protect them from major outside threats. Taking part in many of these raids, Falklands would again would prove to be a fierce pvper with an impressive K:D.
This indiscriminate memeraiding was very enjoyable, attracting even members of the Norse, XDA1, and notably a defecting SpookyBone to Strykergang for the first time. It also resulted in several disgruntled towns forming a shadowy coalition against Strykergang, causing much stress for Falklands and Stryker. They would shatter it in half after discovering it was the work of Brogrammer after a several hour long diplo call with TheBigKazM and his commander Venom_Brass that resulted in them becoming good allies and putting an end to the coalition with all of its members either being conquered or giving up entirely from the pressure of fighting the Server's single most dominant faction. Falklands took pride in how well Palmyra performed defensively, with each siege against it crumbling within minutes. Falklands was one of the last active players, happily building Palmyra until the server was over.
32.0
Nation: Ottoman empire → Northmathr
For 32.0, Stryker again showed little interest in playing due to his now outright rivalry with Onions, causing Falklands to plan in his stead to lead the group as the Ottomans. However, upon learning Brogrammer was planning to create Sweden, Stryker invited the best pvpers he could and made Denmark-Norway on their border. Falklands went through with leading the Ottomans, with the group still acting as a single unit. Unfortunately, with Strykergang split between 3 major towns (Osheim, Istanbul, and Egypt under Ottomans) Falklands didn't have the manpower needed to build his dream city of Constantinople. Blackpilled with the server on only day 2, he cut his losses and merged with Stryker. He did leave behind a successful faction in the eastern med, however, with a returning Vespi3 taking his place as leader of the Ottomans. For the rest of the server, Falklands spent his time exploring the map, memeraiding alone, and building in Osheim in a noble effort to fortify and improve the aesthetic nightmare that it was.
Strykergang would go on to dominate the server. Together with their meta-ally Voltz then under the leadership of LeiteArts10, they conquered a large majority of the server's smaller nations with ease. The final war was a joint invasion of Onions's papacy in Rome, after which Strykergang and Voltz agreed to have a friendly brother war. Once that began, Falklands realized just how powerful their ally was in war. Despite the battle being even, Falklands felt that had it gone longer, the odds may not have been in Strykergang's favor. Unwilling to ever lose again, he knew that his group had to be ready.
33.0
Nation: Babylon
Falklands joined Epochcraft 1 to help his friend SpookyBone by setting up the town of Babylon for him while he was at work, leading the town for a little less than a day before handing it over to Spooky. He spent little time on the server after the first few days as he dislikes melee war, and thus saw no point in investing his time in it.
34.0
Nation: France
Falklands decided this server was where he would finally redeem Paris of 24.0, convincing Stryker to choose France months before launch. He once again helped out the developers of the server by weapons testing and building much of the now famous ww1 test server map.
Strykergang officer core all agreed that the Voltz were a major threat capable of defeating them. Serious plans were made to make sure the group would be able to face them. Falklands got to work designing Paris, opting to try the flower capitol strategy for its node layout. He succeeded in recruiting players new and old to join the effort, bringing back some of Strykergang's oldest faces. During the first week of the server before the storm to come, Falklands spent most of his time building the Elysee, and other minor buildings in Paris.
Falklands stayed out of most of the diplo, too focused on building Paris itself. Stryker and Falklands couldn't decide whether they wanted to help the Anti-Norse hugbox created by Leite, or join the Norse in a grand Newfag vs. Oldfag war. When LeiteArts flipped the board and allied the Norse, Falklands was horrified to say the least. It seemed like Strykergang had been completely played, betrayed by it's long-time secondary town Stongduke and seemingly becoming the target of a Norse-German (Voltz) coalition. The brother war was thrown out the window, and a new bloodfeud began.
Thanks to Leite's power play angering the former members of the Anti-Norse coalition, Strykergang found some unlikely allies overnight in SpookyBone's new fledgling group Serbia, Trenchgang Russia, and the Bronies on Netherlands. Falklands was very anxious about the upcoming war, hastily building last-minute defenses on Stongduke's border. Come the first war day, Stongduke didn't show, and Stryker and Leite agreed to war eachother. Strykergang called all allies to the front to put the traitorous Germans to rest, much to the anger of Leite. Falklands spent the majority of his time on the battlefield claiming into Frankkfurt and building cover for the supporting Dutch and Russians. By the end of the day, France had successfully conquered Frankfurt. The next day however, Falklands was only able to play for an hour. With the Norse now helping their German allies, and overall France's numbers were too few to defend their gains, the frontline was reduced to Paris' doorstep.
After all these years of dominance, it seemed Falklands' efforts to avenge his city were for nothing. It was the nightmare scenario. Tirelessly he worked the next week, helping build as many defenses as he could, discussing strategy for hours with allies, doing absolutely anything to prepare his town for the impossible. He couldn't even be there to help, having to work that day. When the day came he neurotically checked his phone every few minutes for updates. It seemed like it was only a matter of time…
…Until the nodes began to reverse. Thanks to Stryker's genius tactics, the horrifying new defenses of Paris, Swiss mercenaries and the unshakeable war spirit of the group managed to push the Norse out of Europe and the Germans back to the Rhine. Falklands was ecstatic, proud of all he had done to develop his group of friends into a force to be reckoned with. The brave defenders of Paris used his chest room, his walls, his trenches. By now, even the Germans were imitating his meta designs. He had passed the ultimate test.
The next week was spent building and planning for the final war. Once that came, Falklands unironically called out of work to participate. France was again fighting the Germans, who had hired the Swiss for themselves, making the battle around 335~ French and 40~ Germans + Swiss. The battle was big enough to warrant divisions, and Falklands was set in charge of the southern flank with Strykergang's top pvpers Lord_Jebe and Numried with the aim of warding off German backclaimers and Swiss reinforcements. Falklands claims to have been so focused during this battle that he was literally in the neurological “flow state”, was able to pull off incredible feats such as 1v5ing the domsquad, who are now feared for their pvp ability. The power of refined autism.
The war had ended with neither side able to break the other. The border had ended where it began for the most part. After some of the most vicious /int/craft warfare of all time, Falklands had finally completed his final 'mission'. Paris was avenged. Falklands considers France to have narrowly defeated Germany, since they conquered Frankfurt on the first war whereas neither Germany or the Norse were able to take Paris.
Falklands ended the server somewhat unsatisfied. He had hoped to host a Boxing event in his Ring in Paris, but the war simply took too much of his time.
35.0
Nation: Khmer rouge
With Stryker unable to play due to a camping trip, Falklands was for the first time interim Leader of Strykergang. The turnout for Cambodia was greatly diminished compared to Strykergang's showing in 34.0, but that was expected. Falklands nonetheless built a comfy jungle town, and even rallied for war with around ~10 men in hopes of again helping TheSpookyBone against the Fleepers and a resurgent ncordo. The server of course crashed and burned. Falklands reset his router, thanked everyone who showed up to help, and called it an iteration.
36.0
Nation: Otomo
Falklands was originally uninterested in playing this server. Stryker had little interest and less time, and most of Strykergang would only turn up if Stryker did. And if his boys weren't there, why should Falklands play?
That is until either sostrupper/antharres of the domsquad invited him directly to join their town in Funai, Otomo clan. Having befriended them during the struggles of 334.0 and generally admiring the domsquad, Falklands happily agreed, but was for the first time in years reduced to his laptop again, and unfortunately spent most of the server building a mall inside of the Funai spawnroom at sub 10 fps.
Once the first war resulted in the miyoshi Fleepers conquering much of the server including Funai, Falklands felt a familiar feeling deep down. The same one he felt when the Pones had entered Paris. He tried to suppress it since it wasn't his group and he wasn't that invested, but he nonetheless kept the Fleepers in the back of his mind. He was (and still is) confident that had Strykergang played in force, the Fleepers would have been defeated.
37.0
Nation: Reddit Foreign Legion
Falklands, a long-time detractor of Donieions, was a leading member of the Dark Stryker anti-Doneions conspiracy. He dedicated most of his time during the buildup of 38.0 undermining the efforts Doneions and his team from the inside and outside. He began the “May 24th” meme, a falseflag meant to add to the paranoia of Doneions, and leaked chatlogs from the craft lounge between Doneions, his team and Ghoul.
Unable to resist the alure of a new server however, Falklands did plan to build a small memeraid town, roleplaying as the Reddit foreign volunteers on the front. During the short life of the server he actually bothered to build 3 mostly complete buildings (A record for the iteration) and a chestroom (Also a record).
When it became obvious that 37.0 was a complete failure, Falklands downloaded wurst and raped Doneions' janny town members in their spawn.
38.0
Nation: Portugal
During the long, often bleak development of 38.0, Stryker and Falklands were considering making a comeback after almost 2 years of dormancy as a group. The plan was to have one last hurrah as Nazi Germany, in the prophesied 'Final iteration'. Unfortunately, the Fleepers under Gaztons overrode Strykergang's desires to play Germany due to Gaz claiming to have 70 players. While in the end this claim would prove to be completely false and Gaz wouldn't even play, it was too close to release for Stryker and Falklands to work up the enthusiasm to rally everyone again for the server. As a result, Strykergang retired.
Falklands was alone yet again, free to do whatever he wanted. Originally he wanted to have a small meme war with Terribird, desiring that they both pick irrelevant balkan countries and settle their fued. Terri declined. Falklands on a whim chose to build Portugal due to its warm climate. He invited numried to join him, and did little planning for the nation besides a lone capitol building and conceptual ideas of what Portugal would be.
Portugal would go on to be one of the best led and most effective nations on the server despite its small size. Lisbon was in many eyes the server's best city, and the Portuguese were highly successful in both war and diplomacy. The discord server for Portugal was always active with daily voicecalls from players of every nation. It became a community hub of sorts, and is still relatively active to this day (circa 2023).
Falklands considers Portugal 38.0 as a whole to be his greatest achievement in /int/craft for his Leadership and builds.
39.0
Nation: Cuba
Falklands decided to play with Voth in Cuba. The vast majority of his time went to building the peaceful town of 'Guásimas' located in modern day Guantanamo. Together with Bare_minimum, it was /int/craft's first official /heem/ colony. The iteration was very peaceful for Falklands, as Guásimas never saw any conflict and was one of the server's greatest towns.
During the Cuban invasion of California, Falklands led a backcapping campaign with Voth and Numried against the town of Portland, Oregon in order to thwart their support of California. Falklands did as with a heavy heart as earlier that day he recieved a cake from ColdReigningKing, Portland's mayor. Peace was made using Falklands' conquest as bargaining chips, ending the conflict between the towns.
Falklands missed the entirety of the following weeks' Cuban-Dominican Brother war due to work. During the war's aftermath, Guásimas and many other towns were invaded by Aliens Fili was forced to close the server to avoid future extraterrestrial activity.
Legacy
Falklands is undeniably one of most well-rounded individual /int/craft players of all time. He has been successful in almost every aspect of the server, whether it's leading a nation, building one, fighting another, creating content for the community, or even aiding in the development of the iterations themselves.
Falklands' doctrines of base defense and design have revolutionized the metagame of /int/craft. They are now widely practiced by most metagroups, particularly the ones that have lived to tell the tale.
Falklands considers getting revenge on the Bronies in 25.0, avenging his only /int/craft 'defeat' from 24.0 by recreating Paris and successfully defending it in 34.0, and finally achieving his longtime goal of creating the best city on a server with Lisboa in 38.0 (At least in the eyes of most people, anyways) to be his most cherished moments/accomplishments during his time on the server.
Q&A
Favorite iteration: 28.0
Favorite pvp: Modern guns
Favorite time period: Modern day
Favorite moment: Triumph over Danzig in 25.0
Favorite admin: xeth
Favorite metagroup (besides Strykergang): domsquad
Favorite build (mine):
Favorite build (other):
Favorite building style: Mediterranean, Modern
Favorite town: Rome 22.0, honorable mentions Tokyo 20.0, Salt Lake City 28.0.
Trivia
Falklands was the original creator of many notable Strykergang towns, including 34.0 Paris, 31.0 Palmyra, and 30.0 Belgrade.
Falklands has created of many of /int/craft's contemporary combat test maps.
Falklands is one of most active players, and usually lands in the top ten of iterations where playtime is recorded. He had the most hours in 38.0, the most played iteration.
Falklands is typically one of the last players to be online in most iterations.
Falklands is not on the autism spectrum and has no diagnosed mental illnesses, as hard as that may be to believe if you've read this far.
Current Year
Falklands has 'retired' from the competitive aspects of the server, feeling as though he has accomplished more than enough within that realm and proven himself greatly. For the future, he is eager to return to his old ways of building small hermit towns by himself and enjoying splendid isolation.
Author's note: Get a life, lest you end up like me, having written this, and now forewarning you.